Coincidence or God's Work...

Another week has passed and Lindsey and I are coming more to grips with the fact that this is real. It all seemed like a dream at first; however, we are definitely feeling the reality of it now. We had an appointment with our genetic counselor and physician this past Wednesday. The purpose of the appointment was to get another read on the ultra-sound and determine if anything has changed. We were so excited to get new pictures of Brody and get a chance to spend some time watching him move around. The appointment went really well. The group that we are working with has done a great job explaining everything to us in detail. The main concern, besides that fact of Trisomy 13, is that Brody’s heart has a major defect in the upper chamber. It was confirmed once more that Brody’s life will be short. Before we left our appointment, the genetic counselor left us with a packet of questions we needed to think about before Brody is born. A lot of the questions had to do with the type of care we would like for him. The one question that hit me hard was around our plan for his funeral. It is crazy to think about planning a funeral for your son when you haven’t even had the chance to introduce yourself. I know absolutely nothing about funerals. How do I determine where my son should be buried without knowing where I will be buried?  

During the past week I have thought a lot about how Lindsey and I have been able to get this far without completely falling apart. I was talking to my brother the other day and he was curious how we were staying strong during this time. He stated how easy it would be to push away from God, place blame on Him, and be angry towards the situation we were given. It’s funny, because just one month ago I would have said the same thing. But, when you are dealing with a situation that is completely out of your hands you have no option but to have faith.

As I think about the last 3 weeks, it amazes me how God has blessed us with so many signs. Some may say they are pure coincidences, however, I beg to differ. Out of all the genetic counselors we could be given, we were assigned to a woman that is our age, lost her son to Trisomy two years ago, and believes that God is the only answer during this time. At Addison’s two year check-up our pediatrician walked in the room and immediately noticed something was wrong with Lindsey. She explained our situation and he dropped right to his knees and asked her if he could pray. He went on to state that with our permission he would like to be there with us when Brody is born. We never told him we believed in God. That was a bold move for someone that didn’t know our faith. My Grandma called me this past week and wanted to talk about Brody. I could tell she had tears in her eyes as she was talking; it was then when she told me a story that hasn’t been discussed in over 50 years. She too lost a son. His name was Stephen and he passed away at the age of two. She told me the whole story of his life. She ended by saying that there is not a day that goes by where she doesn’t think about him. The only thing that got her through the hard time was that she knew God had a greater plan. I have never talked about God with my Grandma. I honestly never knew if she had a faith.  Being that our situation only happens in up to 1 out of 25,000 pregnancies, how is it that three women have contacted Lindsey in the past two weeks that recently lost their son or daughter to this disorder?  Each one of them has gone out of their way to meet Lindsey and share their story. They have provided a great deal of clarity and comfort. We never advertised our situation and asked for a call. They just stepped up and delivered when we needed them most. How about our Pastor Rich? He not only wants to help us through this time but has offered to be with us at the hospital when Brody is born. It just happens a good friend of his lost his son to this same disorder and he would like nothing more than to hold our hand during the moments when Brody passes. Or the email I received a 2 weeks ago stating that a Bible study was forming in my office with my good friends. Out of nowhere a bunch of guys that I respect deeply decided to form a gathering to support each other’s faith. They didn’t even know my situation at that point. I know that God has a part in all of this and he will continue to spread light on our situation. I still don’t understand why this has happened to us, however, I have peace knowing he is involved.

Brody,

This past week we celebrated Easter with your family. You were on our minds the whole time. I was also able to feel you kick for the first time. You’re a stud! I can’t believe how strong you are and to think you’re only 1 pound. You are bringing a lot of joy to our lives. Your Mom and I are so excited to meet you. I pray that you stay strong so that we can share some time together. I love you with all my heart.

Dad